


Bruised? Try Battered!

by redrobinfection (ChristmasRivers)



Series: JayTim Week 2016 [5]
Category: Batman - All Media Types
Genre: Bananas, Domestic Fluff, M/M, Silly, bruised and battered
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-08-06
Updated: 2016-08-06
Packaged: 2018-07-29 16:22:03
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 796
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7691380
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ChristmasRivers/pseuds/redrobinfection
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Jason is crushed when finds out the bananas he went out of his way to pick up that night got bruised up on the way back from patrol. Tim saves the day with the perfect solution.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Bruised? Try Battered!

**Author's Note:**

> First of two prompt fills for the fifth day - "Bruised and Battered" - of the tumblr JayTim Week 2016.

“Ah, damn.”

Tim turned to see Jason slump against the counter in his small kitchen with a sigh as he considered the object he had just pulled from a considerably wrinkled and torn paper bag.

“What’s up?”

Jason wrinkled his nose. “The bananas we just picked up got trashed after I dropped them to drop those thugs.”

They had just come in early from a joint patrol on an unusually quiet night. Jason had insisted on picking up bananas from a twenty-four hour mart on their way back–“Really? Now? Can’t you wait until tomorrow when you’re not packing heat and wearing body armor?” “No, I gotta have my bananas in the morning”. So, _of course,_ immediately after that they had run into a double gang mugging less than a block from Jason’s apartment. Of course.

Tim squinted at the bunch. “They don’t look _that_ bad, Jay. They’ll be fine for tomorrow.”

“Are you kidding me?!” Jason exclaimed, almost smacking Tim in the face with the fruit as he gestured wildly. “Look at how bruised they are! Look at that!” He pointed to the darkening blotches covering every banana in the bunch. “These were still somewhat green when I picked them up”–just the way Jason liked them, the annoying trivial fact voice in Tim’s head pointed out –“but look at them; they’ve nearly gone brown! How am I supposed to eat these?”

Tim shook his head and leaned back against the edge of the sink behind him. He thought Jason was probably blowing the ordeal massively out of proportion, but understanding how much Jason hated overripe bananas–he _despised_ the cloying sweetness and ultra-mushy texture and Tim had heard the full lecture on it multiple times it over previous breakfasts–he could understand why Jason was so upset with the rapid change of circumstances.

Tim considered the splotchy fruit for a long moment then brightened and snatched the fruit out of Jason’s hand to prod at some of the larger spots.

“Tim! What the h-”

“Jason, I know how to make your bananas edible again; it’ll take less than thirty minutes and we can do it right now.”

That shut Jason up.

—

Tim was wrong about the less than thirty minutes part of it, but after finally getting the temperature of the oil down after having nearly setting it on fire–the smoke had been awful–and whipping up a batter from the limited supplies in Jason’s pantry, they were finally ready to give Tim’s idea a shot.

“Fried…bananas?” Jason had asked with the most laughably bamboozled expression Tim had ever seen.

“Yeah, look them up,” Tim had replied as he had dug through Jason’s pantry for canola oil and flour. Jason had wandered away to grab his computer and come back five minutes later changed out of his gear and staring uncertainly at a websearch.

“You mean like these?” Jason had asked, turning the screen towards Tim as he had poured oil into a pot.

“Exactly! Actually…let me see that for a second, let me make sure I remember how to make these…”

Fifty minutes later they had six bananas battered and ready to fry. “Are you ready?” Tim asked.

Jason shook his head but answered, “What the hell; just do it.” He did the honor of lowering the first bruised and battered banana down into the oil.

One undercooked banana, two blackened lumps, and three oil burns–all of them on Tim–later Jason took over the frying and managed to pull out three perfectly golden, battered bananas which they promptly sprinkled with a tinsy bit of salt and powdered sugar then cautiously dug into.

“Oh my…ugh. Tim.”

Tim raised his eyebrows and peered into Jason’s face, trying to tell if the other man was moaning at how good they were or if Tim should start for the nearest window now. Maybe if he was lucky he could make it to the store for more bananas before Jason could catch him and make him regret ruining the first bunch.

Jason turned to him with an expression like that of person who had just tasted chocolate for the first time or who had suddenly realized that you could eat ice-cream at any time of the year, and then suddenly he was kissing Tim. The kiss was sweet in more ways than one and Tim laughed as he brushed the powdered sugar off the corner of his mouth. He leaned in to take the rest of it off Jason’s lips with another chaste kiss.

“Mmmm, bananas,” Tim teased with a smile.

Jason laughed out loud. “I’ll say!” He grinned down at Tim and pulled another piece of battered banana from the plate consideringly. “We’ll have to buy bananas after patrol more often.”

**Author's Note:**

> I enjoyed this prompt so much, I ended up writing two fills for it! This was the silly, lighthearted fill. The serious, heartwarming fill to follow soon ;3
> 
> My DCU tumblr sideblog is [redrobinfection](http://redrobinfection.tumblr.com/). Link for this work on tumblr: [here](http://redrobinfection.tumblr.com/post/148529191731/bruised-try-battered). Thanks for reading!


End file.
